The Path Less Taken
by iuset
Summary: Set 2 years after Mockingjay, before the Epilogue: Katniss never fully recovered and feels betrayed by those she loves, a coup de grate set against her by Haymitch, her mother, Delly, Annie, Gale and even her beloved Peeta but not all is what it seems! sometimes we need to do things to protect those we love, no matter how hard it is. Second story to Peeta and Katniss, enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

The Path Less Taken

Summary: Set 2 years after Mockingjay, before the Epilogue: Katniss never fully recovered and feels betrayed by those she loves, a coup de grate set against her by Haymitch, her mother, Delly, Annie, Gale and even her beloved Peeta. But sometimes we need to do things to protect those we love, no matter how hard it is.

Authors Note: Hi guys! Welcome to my second story, I hope you do enjoy, against this is angst drama and rated M for language and content. The feel and vibe here is what if Katniss never fully recovered from her demons and emotions 2 years after the Rebellion? Still mentally and emotionally raw from the loss of her loved ones. What happens that leads her to feel utterly betrayed and hurt by those she loves especially Peeta? This story will go into depth, again I hope you enjoy, please read and review

All rights belong to Suzanne Collins:

As I wake and lift my eyes, I see the blinding rays of light piercing through my blinds, I cover myself with my sheets not wanting to face the light outside, I had abandoned it and adapted myself to the dark, moulded to it, lived in it for so long that light seemed strange to me. I looked at my bedside clock realizing it was 11:12, most of the day had already passed, there was a time when time meant everything to me in life, rise early in the morning to hunt, rise to get Prim dressed and ready for school, have enough time to get myself dressed and go, trade and hunt, trade and hunt but now time doesn't mean so much to me anymore, not now when you've lost those you've loved. I still see her eyes in my mind, see the image of the fire engulfing her and the flames licking her, her eyes as the brightness of her soul was extinguished during the Rebellion 2 years ago, and now there was peace, peace for everybody's mind, peace for their soul, but not mine, no peace for me when I wake up in scream and fits every night sobbing, no peace for me when I can't even leave my front door to go outside, no peace for me when I close myself off into the wardrobe, no peace, no peace at all. By now I reckon the townsfolk think I've already gone crazy which their right or that I'm dead, I even heard the children gossip once outside my bedroom window that they see my ghost hunting in the woods with my bow, that's the only thing that makes me laugh these days. Haymitch still lives across from me but now he's adopted a heard of geese, how he and the geese co-exist I can't fathom with him drunk most days or hung over, I commonly hear and see him screaming profanities across the yard chasing the geese as he holds his liquor bottle in the other hand. He still visits me, but I believe he sees me as a thief, an imposter, a person who resembles Katniss, who calls herself Katniss but is instead a tired, shrunken mess of a woman, not the strong, fiery woman who led a Rebellion. Sleep eludes me as the horrors of my mind come back to haunt me in my mind every night, it hurts and I sob but then I sometimes think that this must be my punishment, for every bad thing that has transpired, this is my punishment for the rest of my life. I wake every night in sweat, clutching my sheets, sobbing in tears, my heart races so fast I feel like it will jump out of my chest.

Greasy Sae still visits me, making sure I eat my meals every day, she's probably the reason I am still physically alive at this point, if I had my way I would have stopped eating and died long ago, but she makes sure that I eat or she doesn't leave. Breakfast is small consisting of porridge and fresh fruit and orange juice, soup is for lunch with hearty stew for dinner with fresh cooked bread, the house is clean because of her, I have found in her the thing I was lacking when I was young; a mother, someone who nurtured me, fed me, supported me, it seemed strange at first and sometimes still does, it's so strange this maternal side being given to me. I still receive cards from Gale, you can tell its forced pleasantries, and what do you say to someone when you've killed their sister? It's the difference in the Capital, how it's changed, what he's doing. It's similar to my monthly phone calls with my mother, sometimes I don't even answer the phone when I know she calls, she abandoned me, didn't want to be near me or look, no, because she lost the real daughter she loved, not me though. It was easier to stay away from me than stay and help.

And then there's Peeta, Peeta. Peeta who lives across from me, who bakes every day at both his house and the bakery leaving freshly, baked goods on the doorstep. I hardly see him, only mere sightings and passing's as I look out my window, sometimes when I'm in bed calming myself down from another nightmare, I wish and dream that he would come over here and keep me safe from the nightmares like he used to during the Victory tour, the only time I ever had a decent night sleep was when I was safe in his arms, when he was holding me. I miss him and his smile, his bright blue eyes, his calm persona but it's hard for me to approach him seeing the mess I'm in, look at me, he's got his life back, what right do I have taking that away? I don't want to burden him with my life's mess, I bet he hardly thinks of me or misses me. I can see him finding someone that makes him happy, someone that can offer him a future, someone that can provide him the happiness he deserves, not me though, I'm just a burden.

I sometimes hate my house, the calm and quiet of it all, I sometimes hear it creak and hear noises, sometimes I think have the Capital have installed cameras in here and listening devices, still listening to me, watching me, watching me for their amusement. I hate living in this house, sometimes I like to think I could burn it down to the ground so they couldn't follow me or watch me anymore. I told Greasy Sae once but she laughed and said I was over thinking, but they don't understand, they don't understand what the Capital is capable of. If only Peeta was here, Peeta would make it all go away, he was the only one that would make me feel safe, he was the calm to my fire, he was the calm to my nightmares, he was my dandelion, my hope

Peeta's POV

2 years, it's been 2 years since the end of the rebellion. 2 years of tremors, nightmares, aching leg, rehabilitation and constant medication to control my episodes. I frequently talk on the phone to Dr. Aurelius, I discuss my fears, my challenges, I talk about the good days I have and the bad ones. I8 months after I moved back to District 12 I started work on rebuilding my bakery in the family name, extending it, making it my dream, it helped calm my nerves and concentrate on the good things that I had left, the things that the Capital couldn't take away from me, I tell Dr. Aurelius about my painting and drawing, how it calms me before I go to bed but it doesn't stop the nightmares, I don't think anything will, well nothing but Katniss. Katniss, my Katniss. Dr Aurelius asks me every time if I talk to her but I try to brush over the subject as it hurts too much. Katniss was the only one who could make the nightmares stop, let me have a decent sleep, during the Victory tour when we would go into each other's train compartments we would fall into a realm of easy sleep and comfort, not anymore. My paintings consists of many things; the meadow, the sunset, the dandelions but most importantly of her, Katniss in her hunting stance, Katniss with her hair in her signature braid, her hair loose, the first time I saw her in that red flaming dress during the interviews in the Hunger Games, nobody sees my drawings or paintings, just me, my private collection. My business is thriving now and I have a good team, I still bake from home and leave a couple of loaves on her doorstep knowing that Sae will make sure she eats them. There's not a day that goes by where I'm not thinking of her, not worried out of my mind. I talk to Sae whenever she's on her way home from Katniss's, I ask her how she is, is she mentally better, how is she at taking care of herself? Is she putting on weight? But it's always the same answer, the state of depression, how she's not coping, she just shakes her head indicating no improvement, she further worries me when she tells me Katniss has been talking about how she thinks her house is bugged and wired withy cameras from the Capital, how she thinks that they're still watching her. I sometimes late at night look out my window, wondering what she's thinking, what's she doing, I scarcely see her now. The first time I came back to District 12 and started planting the primroses in her lawn, I can't say I wasn't shocked at her state and appearance, but she was still my Katniss, I would love her no matter what, but after that I hardly ever saw her. I would knock on her front door but never get an answer, I would try ringing but she would never answer. I constantly talked to Haymitch, we discussed her and I made him swear to me that he would watch her, but whenever I went to his house his eyes would give me the answer I didn't want, no improvement, how she was just the same.

But I continue, I continue my routine; make her loaves of bread, make her cheesy buns, make sure Sae and Haymitch are taking care of her. It breaks my heart that she won't allow me in, won't allow me into her life, her heart, her home, if she'd let me I would protect her from her fears, protect her from her demons and quell the nightmares keeping them at bay.

I pace up and down the lounge room of Haymitch's house trying to close my nostrils to the stench of alcohol and God knows what else, I'm pretty sure something died in here but I can't fathom the source. It's a warm day and I smile, the birds are chirping and I can smell pine in the breeze, my smile turns to a frown when I think back of a time when Katniss would have been out in the woods with her father's hunting jacket and her bow bringing in her fresh kill, she didn't need to hunt but it was in her blood, the woods will always be in her blood. But now, now was a different story, a different Katniss.

"I don't know what else you want me to do here, I'm trying here boy but it can be taxing" Haymitch slurs, I can hear in his voice he's already buzzed.

"Haymitch I'm not just gonna leave her like this, it can't go on or am I the only one who's caring for her right now!" my voice rises up as I hear the tinge of urgency and anger in my voice. He slumps down on his lounge and looks at me for a long while before taking another swig from the bottle.

"Boy it takes for some a long while to get back ok? Look at Annie? She's just coming out of the dark and she had help, she got a bit of time with Finnick before he died and that short amount of time gave her a glimmer that life could be better. This will be the same for her" he looks at me long and hard

I breathe in hard and sigh pinching the bridge of my nose as I feel a headache looming.

"Sae said she's getting paranoid, she thinks the Capital has bugged her house and that they've installed cameras in her house while they built it so they can continue watching her, it makes no sense, I'm getting worried about her everyday"

"And Annie used to daze out now and again but look at her now ok?" Haymitch looks at me. "Trust me, she will get there"

I look at him and nod; I walk out of his house back to mine and can't help but glance at Katniss's house, I blame myself sometimes, I think what could I have done to help? Was there something I missed? Did I do something wrong? I don't know I don't know! And as I wrack my brain trying in vain to find an answer I feel a brush up against my calf, I look down to find the mangy old Buttercup purring up against my leg. I bend down and pick him up

"Look at you, what have you got here hey? A couple of feathers in your mouth, have you been hunting like your Katniss hey?" I rub behind his ears and he purrs, I look hard at her house and approach it taking my time walking up her stairs, I'm afraid to say I'm a bit frightened that she will quickly run out, take the cat out of my hands and run back inside slamming the door in my face but no, everything is quiet, too quiet for my liking. I softly knock on her front door expecting perhaps Sae to answer but nothing, no-one.

"Sae?" nothing, silence

I try for the second option.

"Kat...Katniss?" nothing, no-one, just silence. I knock again to no answer before I make I take the plunge.

I slowly turn the knob and open the door; I hear the creak of the door and the floors beneath.

"Kat, Kat?" I quietly repeat. Buttercup jumps from my arms and runs to the kitchen, I walk slowly through the hallway looking into the lounge room. I see her on the lounge; she lays asleep with a blanket only half on her. I quietly walk over to her and grab the blanket covering her and grabbing an extra one I find on the opposite chair and cover her again making sure she's warm. As I finish tucking her in, I take in her features; her hair is mattered and without its beautiful gloss and shine, her skin is like paper and is drawn and ghostly pale, no more of the beautiful olive skin she got from hunting in the woods, I stroke her forehead moving the wispy bits of hair from her fine features, I breath in and exhale as I watch her sleep feeling the sting of tears welling in my eyes, feeling so helpless as I watched her, her fragile self. My hunter, my hope, my little Mockingjay whose wings have been clipped and can't fly anymore.

There's my first chapter guy! I'm exploring different areas here and though it might start off slow it's because I'm building up to something here, I have in the next couple of chapters what I like to call "the big BANG" so please be patient as it is getting somewhere, remember this leads to something that totally shocks Katniss, she feels like this is an utter betrayal from a lot of parties so please review, I hope you enjoyed it, please review as it always makes me happy! :-)


	2. Chapter 2

Rated M for language

All rights belong to Suzanne Collins

Katniss POV:

I dreamt of him last night, I saw him in my dreams, I could smell his scent, feel his touch, it felt so real and then I wake up to nothingness, to the harsh reality of my life, nothingness. I feel the single tear that falls from my eye as I feel stupid at myself, no one's here, of course not, he has a brighter life, a happier one than mine. I move my sore body off the lounge room and feel it start to wake up, I feel the muscles stretch and hear the bones crack, as I move towards the kitchen I stop as I hear it….. Buzzing, I swear I can hear a buzzing whirring sound, is that it? It's a camera, I know it is, it's the Capital, and they're spying on me! I start to look around my lounge room trying to see it, I look at my bookcase throwing books on the floor as I try in vain to find the source, scatter, scatter, and scatter! Books lie on the floor scattered, I start to peel the wall paper from the wall and look under the table throwing it over when I hear the door open

"Katniss!"

I see Sae at the door with the groceries in her hand, she looks at me with pained eyes that show confusion and sadness for me, I look at her before I look at myself in the reflection of the mirror as I see what she sees; a madwoman, an animal, frantic but I KNOW it's here, I know what they're doing, they're watching me and Peeta! God Peeta doesn't know, I have to tell him!

I pick myself off the floor to walk to the door as I think of Peeta before Sae grabs my arm

"Child where are you going?"

"I need to see Peeta, he needs to know, he needs to know Sae what they're doing!" the urgency and pleading in my voice.

"Katniss" she shushes me in a soft voice like a mother reassuring her young child from a nightmare, scared and alone.

"Katniss, come inside, you haven't eaten yet and besides, you're hardly dressed properly! Now what would Peeta think if you came running over to his house screaming and raving and barely dressed? Come on, we're going to go in the kitchen and have some nice porridge and I got some nice fruit too, and I will make you some nice tea"

She places her arm around me and leads me to the table. I sit down with my eyes focused on trying to find the noise, buzz, buzz, buzz. I look up at her questioning her as she puts the kettle on, she offers me a kind smile "come on Katniss, we'll have breakfast together" I nod and settle to eat my breakfast, the day carry's on as I sit on my back porch and sit in silence, waiting and waiting for something to happen to me, I watch the birds fly from the trees and wish for the time when I was that free again, when I could fly and be free and not feel guilty for the pain that I have inflicted in the world. Sae likes me to get a bit of fresh air, even if it means sitting on the porch rugged up, I look back at her as she cleans up the mess I have made, if it was my choice I would sit in the dark realms of my wardrobe refusing to leave but I have these people who for some reason still cling to the hope that I can get better, that I can be "me" again, but what is "me"? How do I go back to what I was before the carnage and war and the bloodshed? How do I just simply forget and move on from the nightmares and terrors that plague my mind every night dancing in my mind with the shadows, I shut my eyes and feel the sting of tears piercing through my eyes and the tears streaming down my face, I feel so alone. Sometimes I feel like this is a bad dream and that if I open my eyes, the light will return, or if I wake up in Peeta's arms I will be safe, my shield and protector from the shadows and monsters that wage in my mind. Sae gets a bath ready for me and I sit in the bath feeling the dirt dissolve off my body, I can't say it but I really do love Sae, I would just leave my ass here in the tub and not look back but she comes for me and helps me get ready for another day of misery, she brushes the snarls and tangles from my hair and it feels nice, she does it in my signature plait and tells me of her day and her granddaughter Daisy, how she grows so fast and enjoys the sugar cookies from Peeta's bakery, I hear he ices them with dandelions and it brings a small smile to my lips, a dandelion, a sign of hope, hope for me? Hope I might get better? Better, no I don't think so, he's so high now on a different plane, how could he save me from the dark realms I'm in? I find some rope and tie knots in it just like Finnick taught me, Finnick; his image flashes across my mind, a smiling and carefree Finnick, his laugh and his jokes but I think the best I saw of him was when he held Annie in his arms, that look of love, that look that they were together at last. I snap out of it and return to my knots, I don't tell Sae but I grow impatient and frustrated as I hear it… buzz, buzz, whir, whir, why can't she hear it! It's somewhere in here, I look around as I bite my nails and skin to the point of bleeding but I don't care. I decide to take a short nap and run upstairs to my bedroom, slamming the door, I shut my eyes and breathe in and out, in and out. I hop into bed, nestled under the covers, I hear Sae and Haymitch joking outside my bedroom window about his geese and how they have nipped him on his butt, I close my eyes and will myself not to dream, a desperate plea before I shut my eyes I take out the necklace I have around my neck and hold it between my fingers, the pearl Peeta gave me, I clasp it tightly willing myself not to dream and though Peeta wasn't by my side to hold the demons away, maybe his pearl could.

I wake a couple of hours later and its 5:30pm, the night is coming and I can smell freshly cooked stew on the air. I stretch my body feeling the kinks come out, I take myself down the stairs before squinting my eyes from the bright light that hits me as I leave the darkness of my room. I feel exhausted as I didn't get any rest from my sleep, it felt broken and as if it didn't nothing for me, I enter the kitchen to find Sae at the stove cooking ladling out the stew into bowls for herself and me and putting steamed rice into the bowl, my stomach growls at the scent as I do not deny how appealing it is, she smiles as we sit and eat in silence, I recognizing the bread she has served as I smell the rosemary and fresh herbs, Peeta's bread, how it smells so good. I dip it into the stew and eat it up lapping up the sauce, we sit a comfortable silence while we eat…. how can she not hear it? I wonder, after we finish our meal I make my way to the lounge room and sit in front of the fire, I hear her clean up while I look at the fire, the oranges and reds, the flames how they dance and move, how so warm and so comforting yet so lethal and dangerous. I sit in silence as I hear the whirs and buzzing and want to scream but in keep it inside….only till Sae leaves then I will unleash it, I don't know how long I can take of this, I shut my eyes trying to keep the noise out but silently I am searching and listening for the source. As I sit in silence, I hear noises coming outside, laughter, but not just any laughter Peeta's laughter! I pull the blinds and peer out seeing Peeta and Delly laughing, she pulls a bit of her hair behind her ear, they're joking and laughing, I envy her as I watch her, what's NOT to like, her voluptuous body, her perky personality, her dress, I will never be that, no, she's perfect for Peeta, perfect, something I will never be. I watch him through the blinds and he jokes and laughs, smiling, I have not seen that smile for so long, he indicates to her that he has to get back inside and they both part but not before embracing each other, he enters the warmth of his house closing his front door and to me. I close the blinds and continue to look at the fire, Sae puts on her coat and kisses me on the head.

"Don't stay up too late, I made you a light snack ok? I'll see you tomorrow" She goes to leave before I say thank you. I sit looking at the fire before I decide, it doesn't take long, it doesn't even seem obscure, it seems somewhat fitting. I get up to pack my belongings, only things that matter, I pack the belongings of Prim into a suitcase and collect that mop of a cat Buttercup, it's night and I walk outside my house with the suitcases and Buttercup, I walk to Haymitch's knowing they will be safe there and my belongings. I walk back in the calm of the night in the fresh, crisp air stepping confidently back into my house, not really my house; the house that the Capitol built and that's when I decide while looking at the fire…..

Tonight was the night….

I was going to watch this house burn to the ground!

That's the end of chapter 2, what I'm trying to depict here is the emotional and psychological turmoil that Katniss is going through, she's not in a right state at all so what seems right to her is actually not sane at all, she's all over the place at the moment and very erratic. The next chapter will be in Peeta's POV which will see another side and different viewpoints and new information on the situation. Please review, I hope you enjoy and you will begin to see the bigger picture in the next couple of chapters!:-)Please review as it makes me smile!


	3. Chapter 3

Hi guys! Sorry for the delay but studies have taken my time! A lot of my time has been devoted to studies however now I have free time I can concentrate on pumping out some more chapters! Also I have noticed that my chapters have not been going to the top of the page every time I have updated so until I get it sorted perhaps follow this story so you don't miss out on chapters, if there is anyone who could suggest any help that would be AMAZING!, I hope you enjoy and please review as it always makes me smile! All rights reserved to the brilliant Suzanne Collins who created this brilliant series

Peeta's POV

I left her that morning kissing her forehead, I whispered to her that I loved her but I don't know if she heard me, when I was in 13 I can remember some people in the hospital were in something called a coma, a deep deep sleep but the doctor said that even though they didn't respond and were asleep, they could still hear everything. Sometimes I hope that's the case with Kat, that even though she can't respond to me, that at least she can hear me. I leave for work not bothering to go to my house and changing, I have spare clothes in my office which I can change into. The air is cold and bites and I pass Buttercup on my way, I make my way quickly to the bakery to warm myself up, as I enter the bakery I turn everything on and get set up for the day. I change my clothing, a fresh white tee and black pants; I start my day making fresh bread when Rory comes to begin his shift.

"Hey Peeta!" he smiles at me, placing his bag down

"Hey Rory" I smile, after the Rebellion and everything settled Rory came back to District 12, he was with his brother for a few months but when he returned he returned as a man, he missed 12; the smell of the woods, the sunshine and the people, he said he couldn't stand the Capitol or District 2, it wasn't for him and to be honest I was glad when he came, I had someone else to talk to, be my friend, after losing my brothers I felt like I had no male companions, but Rory soon made me feel like another brother to him and soon I had that feeling back, the wrestling around, the joking and laughing, it felt good, Rory knew I wasn't that much of a fan of Gale but I never made it obvious, that would be disrespectful. Rory puts his apron on and comes to me

"So, um Peeta I was wondering, you know how me and Delly have been together for some time now?"

"Yeah" Rory reminded a lot of myself when he came back, he fancied Delly always, I always caught him staring at her, looking at her, but he could never get the courage to ask her out, he said just as he got the nerve to he would be intimidated by her beauty and smile and personality, it reminded me of myself towards Katniss. Then finally at a town dance one night, when we all went, myself supplying all the bread at the festival, I finally pushed Rory into Delly to make him strike up a conversation. Now he is together with Delly and happily living together.

"Well um I know we have not done this the traditional way but please don't tell Del I told you, but um we are actually expecting a baby now" I smile at his new and hug my friend

"Congratulations man when did you find out?"

"3 months ago but we wanted to make sure, you know, anyway Del wants to ask you something later on tonight, I can't say what cause she'll kill me but um would you mind seeing her?"

"Of course man I hope it's not something bad?"

"No no of course not, something I hope you will agree to" he looks up at me with hopeful eyes that I cannot say no to

"Of course Rory, anything for you man"

Our day is long and busy with customers coming in frequently to buy their bread, ever since the war ended District 12 turned from a once starving district segregated into 2 factions; rich and poor to an even ground where everyone had everything and didn't have to starve, no more hollow cheeks, no more children with empty bellies looking skeletal, it was now flourishing with people even coming from District 13 to live here. Our day ended and I closed the store with Rory as we made our way home It was 5:15 and as I made my way home I could see Delly sitting on my porch. She jumps up and runs to me wrapping her arms around me

"Hello Delly" I'm careful with her as I swing her around

"So I take it Rory's told you our good news then?"

"He certainly has"

We chat for a while on our porch, I offer her inside but she says she is in a rush, we laugh and joke and chat before she asks me

"Well I was wondering, well WE were wondering" she places some of her hair behind her ear "if you would like to be of course our baby's godfather when he's born?"

I feel pride in my chest and warmth at this generous offer, I would be lying if I said I never wanted to have children of my own "I would be honoured to Delly" she squeals before giving me a big hug. Its' getting darker and darker and I offer to walk her home but she assures me she is fine. I go back into my house and light up the fire and get the house warm, I start the dinner and get into the shower. I feel the hot spray of water on my skin and feel all the tension leave my body with the day's dirt and grime as it swirls down the drain, I wash my hair and let the calm take over my body. After I take my time in the shower I get out to get changed into a comfortable pair of trackies and tee, I walk down the stairs where I smell smoke thinking I have burnt my dinner however this is not the smell of burnt dinner, but wood, wood burning, I look out the window to see the vibrant glow of red and hear crackling of wood, the smell of smoke is wafting through my house and I quickly turn off the stove before I go outside, as I open the door I see the house of Katniss burning, half of her house is burning going up in flames, I cover my face and quickly take my surroundings before I hear my name

"PEETA!" I turn to face Haymitch who has a bucket of water WITH Sae running behind him with a bucket throwing it on the house

"Haymitch what happened!" I scream in terror trying to find sight of Katniss

"She burnt it, she burned down her own fucking house!" he screams throwing water over the burning house with Rory beside him throwing water screaming at some of the boys from the time for more water

"Where is she?" I scream

" She's over there with Delly, she's holding her on the porch" I turn to Haymitch's house to see Delly as she looks at me, her eyes pained as she holds Katniss in her arms, I look at her as she watches the house burning entranced by the scene. I walk up to her glancing at Delly as she holds onto Katniss.

"Katniss sweetie what did you do?" I ask softly as I hold her in my arms, she doesn't look at me as she stares at the burning house before her. Finally she responds

"I did it Peeta I did it, I had to save us from them, they're gone now" it breaks my heart as I look at her face and in her eyes, I hold her face in my hands as I feel the brim of tears well up, my little mockingjay, what will happen to you now?

Thank you to my readers who have waited patiently, I have been soooo busy with work as of late it has taken up so much time. I intend though on updating a lot quicker for you. Please review, I hope you enjoy and again please review


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